Welcome Olivia Rose!

Sticking with tradition it took me three weeks to finally make my blog birth announcement for Grayson ... So introducing our sweet baby girl who is already 3 weeks old!...

Olivia Rose Bianco



She cooperated (unlike her brother) and stuck to our scheduled date... However, I had been having contractions for a couple of weeks and the day before they were getting closer and closer. We dropped Grayson off at his buddy's house for a sleepover and went to Red Lobster for a last meal - I had contractions all night. We went in at 5:30 in the morning and when they hooked me up to the monitor belts my contractions were coming closer and closer. My doctor said that she was going to make her arrival that day no matter if we scheduled the c-section today or not! ;)


The surgery went seemingly and she was born at 7:55am on Jan 29th. She was 21in and 8lbs 10oz of perfection. (Later I realized her birthday had special significance as it was the same date Tony proposed to me 9 years ago.)

Later that day we got test results of jaundice, anemia and something wrong with our two different blood types mixing and she had to be put in her bed under lights for the remainder of our stay in the hospital. We only got to take her off and hold her when I needed to feed her. It was heartbreaking not being able to hold and soothe by new baby girl. The days and hours were agonizingly slow watching her under the lights and I have never been so ready to get out of the hospital!

Grayson has been amazing with her! Him and daddy went to Build-A-Bear and made a birthday bear for sister and he was so excited to show us in the hospital and see me. I missed him so much! He has been so sweet with her. We still have our awesome almost 3 year old meltdowns and tantrums, but he loves his "baby ister"! He helps with every diaper change and helps put her "ba" (pacifier) back in her mouth when she's crying. It's been the sweetest to watch him love her.

 

It has been surreal watching life around me. A sweet sleeping baby near me and Grayson and daddy playing in the background. Our life is so much sweeter with her, I didn't realize how much we were missing. All those fears I posted about last are mostly gone... But they still creep up. It's a little stressful in the evenings during her "bewitching hours" which are the same hours that G is home from school and wanting to play and have attention... I have moments when I feel like I'm not enough and can't do this on my own. But I know that is Satan whispering in my ear and my God has, is and will equipped me to be their momma. I have to remind myself it's only been 3 weeks and it's going to take time to get the hang of things and get a routine. In the meantime, I'm going to soak up every second with my kids before I go back to work, enjoy each sweet moment and breath through the stressful ones. Pray for me, pray for us and thank you for all your love and sweet comments! :)

 

 

One more day...

The day before Grayson arrived, I wrote my last blog post before becoming a mom... Although it was unknowing to me that he would arrive the next day! So, in keeping up with tradition I thought I should blog today before Lady O makes her arrival tomorrow! Also, I just realized it has been an entire month since my last blog post!

Not that I don't have anything to say... It's quite the opposite... I have so many thoughts and emotions and fears and anxieties and excitement of what tomorrow and the next days/weeks brings that I have thought of a thousand different blog posts and drafted up many, but I just can't filter it all out to make any sense or grammatical correctness.  And I still can't! But I documented so many of my feelings when I was pregnant with Grayson, I know that I'd be disappointed later if I didn't get it all out this time around. So... I'm just going to start typing anything that's floating around in my head... It might be one long run-on sentence, so bare with me! ;)

This time around has been so very different. More uncomfortable, more tired, lots more pain... but not just the physical things. I remember being so excited and anxious about becoming a mom. We were finishing seminary and had a lot of unknowns ahead of us, but I felt completely prepared for bringing a baby home to our little apartment. This time, I don't feel that prepared! We are settled with a great church home and jobs, home owners and a nursery - but over and over I keep telling Tony how "not ready" we are.... I keep feeling ill-prepared and I don't know why or how to shake it! This is my second kid - I should feel like I know what I'm doing a little bit more this time around. We have a bigger support system here than we did before and I am SO thankful for all that God has and is doing in our lives the last 2.5 years. 

I had no idea being a mom of a boy could be so amazing! I didn't know it could pull at my heartstrings so much or how emotional it would be. Grayson has turned my world and my heart upside down! I had (have) such a close relationship with my mom. She is my best friend. When I was pregnant with G (before I knew it was a boy) I hoped and envisioned for a little girl. I wanted such a close relationship with my child, and had no idea a little boy could fulfill it. Now I'm having a little girl and I'm so nervous! How will it change my relationship with Grayson? Will she be a daddy's girl and want nothing to do with me? I want so badly to have the same relationship with her as I do my mom, I'm nervous of the expectation I'm putting on it. I don't want Grayson to feel left out or any less because of her arrival. As much as I fear that she won't be as close to me as G is, I cannot wait to see Tony get to be a daddy to a little princess! I anticipate how much his heart will change with a little girl as mine did a little boy. I anticipate a stronger bond for my boys as I have to tend to a baby a little more. I'm excited and fearful and a little sad (all at once) that this time around I'm going back to a job after a few short months. So thankful to have a job and position that I love to make leaving my baby worth while... and at the same time sad that I won't have that time home with her as I did with Grayson. With all that's happened with Grayson and daycares I'm nervous and anxious about finding care for Olivia. Praying to God that He will send the right person for us to welcome into our home to care for our baby to many hours a day. 

And then I have moments of just pure excitement and joy! After a brief moment that I wasn't sure we'd get to expand our family, I am overjoyed and overwhelmed that God is allowing me to have a daughter. Every time I use type or say "daughter" I'm a little giddy with excitement that I get to have one. All the frills and bows and girlyness, of course, but that part of me that is ever so passionate about girls and their worth and beauty is excited to share that with my own. That God is allowing Tony and me to raise a man of God, strong and bold in his faith; and a daughter of the King, worthy and priceless. O, that He would enable us to raise our children up in His ways and use us for His Kingdom. 

.... So that was all the jumbled mess that's been floating around this last month not allowing the words to write a post. Sorry for the word and emotions explosion. ;)

Last night was my last night to put Grayson to bed and cuddle with him as an only child. Tonight he is spending the night at a friends as we have to be at the hospital at 5am tomorrow. And after my c-section I'll be limited from the stairs for a little while and won't be putting him to bed for a week or two. I won't lie, I've been a little weepy about it. More emotional than I expected about how limited I'll be with him and how much I'll miss him the next few days. But come tomorrow we will be a family of four... and as many momma friends have told me - my heart will expand to love this new little one just as much as Grayson. He already loves her and I pray for an easy transition for him and us. Please be praying with and for us. Thank you all for your support and love!

Texan Christmas

We have lived in Texas for 5 Christmases and this year, due to being very pregnant, was the first time we stayed home for Christmas!  While we missed our families terribly, it was exactly what we wanted and needed as our last Christmas as a little family of three before baby girl comes. We are so excited for little one to come and make us a family of four... but in these last weeks I am cherishing and soaking up every little memory making moment as a family of three and with my baby boy while he's still the baby.



I'd like to say that it was peaceful and restful and perfect... but it's real life. ;)  Unfortunately during the Christmas Eve service, Grayson started spiking a temperature. Christmas morning we were so tired... not from "playing santa" and wrapping gifts all night, but from getting up every hour with our sickly little boy and his rising temp. Thankfully it had broken by morning and we had a great time opening presents and playing most the day.

This was our first Christmas Eve service - it was so amazing. Such a beautiful candlelight service celebrating the birth of our Savior. Grayson was so excited to get to go to "big church" for the first time... but he didn't make it through without konking out. :(

And we attempted a Christmas family picture in front of the tree.... But Grayson wasn't feeling very photogenic after his little nap.

 Christmas morning he was feeling better and could not wait to open his presents!

This little only child is so completely blessed! Family shipped all his presents so he could have them Christmas morning.

 He got a doctor's kit and has been doing "check ups" all day! He opened new spider man shoes and had to put them on right away before opening any other present.

 He also got a new baby doll to help him get ready to be a big brother and take care of his "baby inter" and a basketball hoop which has been fun for all of us!

 And if I could brag for a minute.... This guy is amazing! My sweet husband always does so much for his family and works so hard for us - but during this pregnancy especially, he has been going above and beyond in taking care of us. We were all so tired Christmas day from the night before that we all took a nap, but he woke up early to start Christmas dinner, and let me keep sleeping when Grayson woke up. He woke me up with a huge Christmas dinner made by him all while watching and playing with Grayson. He spoils me and I am so blessed!

Now we have 4.5 weeks before baby girl arrives. We have lots to do to get ready for her arrival. Tony gets to be home with Grayson all week while his school is on break. So he has lots to get done for us. And I'll try to leave the house for work and not be jealous every morning next week while they cuddle on the couch and play all day. :)

Life

This poor blog has been neglected lately, but life happened and suddenly it's the week before Christmas, 6 weeks (to the day) before Olivia's arrival and I am a very large and tired 33 weeks! :)

This is the first year ever (since moving to Texas) that we are staying home for Christmas! That means we have all of December for some Holiday festivities and resting together without the stress and craze of packing and traveling... So we've been doing just that! We went to Santa's Wonderland and drove through thousands of lights - Grayson was in awe!

We got back home from snowy Illinois Thanksgiving and I received a baby shower from my sweet friends at work! A week later, I started in a new position at work. I am absolutely thrilled to be doing something I'm passionate about and using my degree as the new Communications Associate at our church. It's a step up for me and a great opportunity! It's a little crazy starting at 32 weeks pregnant (hello pregnancy brain!) - but I'll work here 8 weeks, then take my maternity leave and jump right back in. :)

Speaking of, we have 6 weeks to the day before our baby girl's arrival. We have scheduled the C-Section for January 29th... So hopefully she doesn't take after her brother and come early. As the weeks and days come closer to us being a family of four I have had an intense need to capture and relish in every sweet moment with Grayson while he is an only child. This sweet little momma's boy has me wrapped around his finger most days. He's getting so gosh darn smart and thinks he can negotiate with that little smile and winks at me. Goodness he's a charmer! We've been on lots of dates lately soaking up each other.

Pregnancy has gotten much better than the first 5 months ;) I am just tired! But what preggo momma isn't!?  We are doing good and she is right on track. We have a "getting ready for your c-section" class at our hospital tomorrow - just so we know the procedures of a new hospital. And we get to see her on an ultrasound next week before Christmas!

I'll update again after Christmas! I'm so excited to wake up in our home together as just the 3 of us and soak up the day. :) Merry Christmas!!

Snow & Thanksgiving

We went to Illinois for the week of Thanksgiving - Usually we go for Christmas, but I will be far too pregnant to travel then. It was so good to get away from everything and relax with family! It was especially sweet because it SNOWED! My two little snow buddies (Tony and Grayson) were completely thrilled! We got to see both of Tony's grandmas, got lots of cousins time and lots of food.

I think the sweetest and newest thing about this trip from all the others was Grayson's obsession and adoration for his older cousin, Koen. Koen is my first and only nephew and Grayson absolutely adored him and asked to see and play with him everyday we were in Illinois!

I will let the pictures speak mostly for themselves....

Above: the flight there he was happy, awake and excited...

Below: the flight home he was wiped out!

One of our favorite things to do when we lived in Illinois during the holidays was going to the Festival of Trees. We were so excited that the dates worked out to get to go while we were there - and we got to go with all of our family.

Cousins.... See how Grayson looks at Koen!? He did that all week - copied everything he did and said.... it was precious!

 

SO much fun in the SNOW!!!

 

Those last two pics.... my little snow buddy! :)

Of course in making sure to capture every new moment of Grayson, we didn't get any good pics of us or grandparents or aunts/uncles.... Typical first child problem ;) (Many more pics on Facebook soon!)

We had a great time! And as much as I'm going to miss them all at Christmas, we are getting really excited about having our very first ever Christmas at home! It's the first time we are home all December and the first Christmas home to start new family traditions and the last Christmas as a family of three. I'm going to soak up this month and make lots of memories!